Provocative Lip Balm

We've heard that a lot of you use our more salty lip balms as not-so-subtle messages in uncomfortable social situations, so we thought we'd give you a few more (even saltier) options. Now you can stock your drawer with a full spectrum of silent retorts and be prepared for whoever shows up in front of your desk!

Each balm in this series has its own insult and its own flavor, so choose wisely! And no, Karen, we can't switch up the flavors. 

This balm is designed to melt into your lips, not into your jeans! Which is good, because I keep mine in my butt pocket. That would be embarrassing... It's got lots of yumminess in it: natural beeswax (you'll smell a little extra honey), unrefined cocoa butter (you'll smell a little cocoa too), unrefined shea butter, jojoba, sweet almond, and grape seed oils, vitamin E, and flavor oil. It's carefully formulated to give you the perfect balance of protection and softness, so you won't end up feeling greasy or waxy. My mom says, "Ooo, creeamy" every time she uses hers, if that's any indication. She has a little flair for the dramatic.

It comes in an oval plastic twist-up tube, which holds .15oz/4g and is individually shrink wrapped.

If you're thinking about being that jackass who spoils the movie for everyone else, take a minute, put on some lip balm, and remember that BRUCE WILLIS WAS DEAD THE WHOLE TIME! Each label is armed with one of hundreds of different spoilers. Some are obvious, some are obscure, some are rewrites to reflect what obviously should have happened instead of what actually happened. Sorry, we're going to have to pick the spoilers for you. No, we can't tell you which one you're going to get, that would spoil it.

Flavor: chocolate and soda. Because movies, and popcorn is so clichéd.

This balm is designed to melt into your lips, not into your jeans! Which is good, because I keep mine in my butt pocket. That would be embarrassing... It's got lots of yumminess in it: natural beeswax (you'll smell a little extra honey), unrefined cocoa butter (you'll smell a little cocoa too), unrefined shea butter, jojoba, sweet almond, and grape seed oils, vitamin E, and flavor oil. It's carefully formulated to give you the perfect balance of protection and softness, so you won't end up feeling greasy or waxy. My mom says, "Ooo, creeamy" every time she uses hers, if that's any indication. She has a little flair for the dramatic.

It comes in an oval plastic twist-up tube, which holds .15oz/4g and is individually shrink wrapped.

This lip balm won't quit on you after promising to be with you forever.

Flavored with Irish Cream, obviously.

This balm is designed to melt into your lips, not into your jeans! Which is good, because I keep mine in my butt pocket. That would be embarrassing... It's got lots of yumminess in it: natural beeswax (you'll smell a little extra honey), unrefined cocoa butter (you'll smell a little cocoa too), unrefined shea butter, jojoba, sweet almond, and grape seed oils, vitamin E, and flavor oil. It's carefully formulated to give you the perfect balance of protection and softness, so you won't end up feeling greasy or waxy. My mom says, "Ooo, creeamy" every time she uses hers, if that's any indication. She has a little flair for the dramatic.

It comes in an oval plastic twist-up tube, which holds .15oz/4g and is individually shrink wrapped.